Friday, January 20, 2006

Never knew =(

I never realised you were so important to me untill today. A simple message from you was all I needed to stop tossing around in bed and sleep in peace. I guess I won't be thinking of risking our friendship again like that anytime soon. U are too important a friend to me. =/

I really don't like this feeling of having someone be so important to me. Takes away my sense of self. Like as if my happiness revolves around this one person. I'm happy when you are happy, when you are sad, I worry about what I should do to cheer u up.

I don't even know if you know. Hate this feeling of uncertainty. I hate not knowing what's gonna happen between us if you do realise one day what was going on. Whatever happens, I know I want to keep you close. In whichever way you find comfortable. I really wish I could shake off this feeling.

While tossing and turning...I was imagining what it would be like if you decided to simply avoid me after today. I actually felt my heartache a little. Just a little. Hahaa...I should thank you huh? Haven't felt that stony heart of mine in years.

Goodnight. Hope you had a good day...

3 comments:

tokimeki said...

hmm.. seems like u r in a 'go' or 'not to go' situation?
try thinking of it like this. if u don't go for it, will you be able to just treat her as a fren? without a resounding no (in the worst case scenario), the hint of possibility will always be there i think. so might as well give it a shot and get the closure u need.
but then again, if you already know it's gonna be a no. then convince yourself and keep a gd fren.
juz a few cents from me.. dunno how much sense it makes.
and do cheer up! =) you sound really troubled man.

Heavenly Drain Water Chicken said...

I agree with tOkImEkI!

As in the words of my friend Chun Li(who likes to play with quotes)
"Should I smile for you my friend? Or cry because that is all we will ever be?"

or something like that....
Take it easy Sunshine...

fattybombom said...

Haha...bingx ah, i really dunno whether i'll be able to just treat her as a friend. Took me quite a while to admit to myself that yes, she may be more than that. didn't really wanna start thinking about that coz she's such a good friend. We'll shall see i guess...

Chicken! haha, wot an apt quote. i'm gonna use it for my msn........